darknessdevilgirl.com
Lil Pieces
found some notes from darknessdevilgirl.com , just wanna keep it here. Enjoy..!!
May 12th, 2009 coretan hati, pic
(: ngantuk..cape..gila banget 2 hari ni, dapet tugas diluar kantor mulu, jalan kesini, jalan kesana, but its ok, its fun anyway
dunno why, a long the road of this city, many things came up in my mind i cannt say bad things or good things, cos all those memories just came inside, memories with persons, places, and many things i cannt explain. Somehow, [again] i feel grateful to be here.
when 1st i came to this city, i know nothing bout it, and i cannt take him anywhere, we both lost so many times (LOL) and thats one reason what made this city precious to me, picture of him will always be found everywhere wish i could say to him, now i know a lot bout this city, so i know where we should go next time you come but, unfortunately that wont ever happen so i ll just enjoy the memories of him.
(doh) kenapa jadi ngelantur kemana-mana sih malah jadi lupa mo ngomong apa *sigh* mmhh…sampai dimana tadi oh ya, so along the journey, i see so many new faces, hear so many sound, and then it makes me think, life is so colorful
hmm…sebenerna waktu ngetik ini, ada yang manis manis ngajakkin ngobrol :shy: makana jadi postingan yang ga nyambung and now im wondering, why this heart beat so fast
well, ga tau deh mo ngomong apa…ni senyum manis saia oleholehna *digaplok*
nahhh, manis kaaaann???? *kabur sebelum ditimpuk*
May 13th, 2009 for fun
last night, with my sista, we went to chocolate cafe. Usually we go there with aanother boy friends, drink chocolate and talk nonsense (drinking) but last night, its just two silly tired girls . Actually i dont wanna go out (: , because im already out all day long, but since she asked me to go, i cannt refuse it .
So, we went there, and order chocolate drinks (drinking) and cream soup (mmm) which is sooooo delicious, u can see iit in the picture she ordered strawberry ice cream and praline drunk and i myself ordered chocolate loko koko which is sooooooooooooooooooooooooo sooooo sooooooo yummy (mmm) well, im chocolate lovers anyway, and drink hot chocolate made my body relax and more sleepy than before, so we just spent about two hours then going home.
yummy
yummy
and, on the way home, as a narsist girls off course we took a picture
ladies night
May 14th, 2009 for fun
second ladies night
well, again tonight i cannt get a sweet dream, instead of it, my friends and i [again] going to some place, well, okay..you know it from facebook status. yeap, we went to boshe (devil). Actually, 1st we planned to go to Empire, but then my friends were taking us to boshe (evilsmirk) for me, i prefer cafe or chocolate restaurant because more quiet and refreshing there. Hot / Cold chocolate really work for me, it makes me getting sleepy .
today, i mean yesterday -since this is 5 am in the morning – i had to out of the office to complete discboard meeting that will be hold on 20 May, yeap, its a big ocassion, and im the one who should prepare it, thanks God, its not too hot like yesterday, the cloud protect from the sun and getting black * im white,okay, protes gaplok* but, today yesterday i walked alot and i cannt feel my feet again *melebay* but so far i enjoy it
And there we are, at boshe, in the middle of loud music, dancing all night long (banana_rock) well, okay i just sat and move my head but friends of mine pull me to the top stage asked me to dance . We went home at 3.40 am in the morning, and even i really need to sleep, i cannt did it because i have to work in the morning 8-) so i spent time wait to the morning talking nonsense (LOL) and now, i havent sleep yet..but still have to work
well, this is us…*part of my friends who join the night*
me & friends
May 18th, 2009 coretan hati
have you ever fallen ?
into love that undefined
down deep till unfounded
have you ever hate ?
and anger dominate
so strong till it takes you away
love as feel like will die tomorrow
then find a way to make it precious
hate as you know you will life forever
then you will feel its useless
as we know life is just once
Love is another name of Hate when u feel it too much
Hate is another name of Love when u always try to satisfy
just another note of mind
just wanna say that sometimes we appreciate love when its gone
and sometimes hate just wasting time and mind
May 23rd, 2009 verrouillé
the eye no longer shine
dark sky turn into shadow
eating the light as quick as it can
lost in the dark meadow
heart beating
silently screaming
fake smile showing
while the tears hanging
searching
place like home that’ve been missing
wish i have my own time to think and crying
May 26th, 2009 eng, verrouillé
if i have that courage
to go to your place
would you see me ?
if only i follow what my “ego” want
just to see your face
would you meet me?
if just i can
leave all this behind
would you accept me?
all i want just to see you
all i need just to look at your smile
all i have to do just go there and meet you
and only if..
*sedang berusaha keras menjaga kewarasanku untuk tak berbuat nekat dan pergi menujumu*
Kala
May 26th, 2009 coretan hati, ind
ada kalanya aku hanya ingin terdiam
menutup semua pintu dan ruang
mendengar dan memandang
ada saatnya aku hanya ingin sendiri
berteman bayang sepi yang menari-nari
bukan karena sedang membenci
ada waktunya kubangun tembok tinggi
disekeliling sekedar melindungi
tak mau jatuh dan sakit lagi
kala aku terdiam
saat aku sendiri
waktu aku sembunyi
tetaplah disini
tunggu aku kembali
June 1st, 2009 for fun
hatiku dulu tak begini
tapi kini tak sama lagi
June 6th, 2009 eng, for fun, verrouillé
[Intro]
You should tell me whats buggin you
And Imma tell ya bout me
Make a wish and tell me your deepest thoughts
And Imma make it easy
Make a wish tell me whats buggin you
And Imma tell ya bout me
Make a wish and tell me your deepest thoughts
And Imma make it easy
[Verse 1]
Emotions running wild
I could feel it when I’m next to you,
Something’s on ya mind
You wanna stay but wont tell me,
its about ya secrecy
So what are you tryna hide?
I know what the look means
You hold my hand so tightly,
Whenever we say goodbye
Standing by the door,
I could tell you can’t take no more
Blow your secret open wide
[Chorus]
So maybe if you say it
Tell me what it is you likeeee (likee)
Baby baby dont be shyyy (shyy)
Maybe you can spend the nighttt (nii-iii-iightt)
If you say it
But if you playin (not wit it)
Cuz you know what I wanna hear (hearr)
Say it, that’ll make it more clear (clearr)
I need to know how you feel
So baby why wont you (say it), say it (say it)
[Bridge 1]
Wont’, won’t you tell me
What, what’s going on
Why, why you waitin’ on it
What you waiting for?
Soon you should tell me or I might be gone
But I’m here for you baby,
You should put me on
[Verse 2]
I won’t shoot you down,
Make you feel some kinda way
If you’ll be honest with me
Put away your pride,
I can see it in your face
You want me permanently (unh)
Like how i wine when we dancing,
I know how it happened
And I’m right there wit you
But I won’t be the first to out myself out there,
The feeling is mutual
But I bet if you
[Chorus]
Say it
Tell me what it is you likeeee (likee)
Baby baby dont be shyyy (shyy)
Maybe you can spend the nighttt (nii-iii-iightt)
If you say it
But if you playin (not wit it)
Cuz you know what i wanna hear (hearr)
Say it, that’ll make it more clear (clearr)
I need to know how you feel
so baby why wont you (say it), say it (say it)
[Bridge 2 2x]
Your eyes steady talking
And your tryna fight it
But some things baby are not worth hiding
And we can find heaven,
If we go look together
So won’t, won’t you tell me,
And get it off your chest
[Chorus]
So maybe if you say it (saa-ayyyy)
Tell me what it is you likeeee (what it is you like) (likee)
Baby baby dont be shyyy (shyy) (oh no no)
Maybe you can spend the nighttt (nii-iii-iightt)
If you say it
But if you playin (not wit it)
Cuz you know what I wanna hear (you know what I wanna hear) (hearr)
Say it, that’ll make it more clear (so boy say it loud and clear)
I need to know how you feel
So baby why wont you (say it), say it (say it) (saa-ayyyy ittt)
[Bridge 2 2x]
Your eyes steady talking
And your tryna fight it
But some things baby are not worth hiding
And we can find heaven,
If we go look together
So won’t, won’t you tell me,
And get it off your chest
[Chorus]
Say it
Tell me what it is you likeeee (likee)
Baby baby dont be shyyy (shyy)
Maybe you can spend the nighttt (nii-iii-iightt)
If you say it
But if you playin (not wit it)
Cuz you know what i wanna hear (hearr)
Say it, that’ll make it more clear (clearr)
I need to know how you feel
so baby why wont you (say it), say it (say it)
arrrwww…i love Rihanna
Believe
June 6th, 2009 eng, verrouillé
start to believe to not believe
no such thing like heart thief
like a moon replace the sun
thats how the feeling came
deceive you in lonely time
gone when when it fullblown
left you drown
undone
June 11th, 2009 coretan hati, eng
door locked
smilling face looking outside from the window
wave my hand as high as you can see
again, you just smile from the window
looking at me dancing at your grassy yard
enjoying play with little rabbit
come,come i scream
again, you just smile from the window
staring at me that still waiting
down on my knee im begging
for you to out and coming
and the tears falling
wait, i see your door creep
faster my heart beating
seeing you doubtfully peek
slowly walking through your door
giving you my hands to hold on
lets face the sun
im here to show you the world
again, you smile
this time im sure your smile is wonderful
[Never] Stop
June 12th, 2009 eng, verrouillé
i [wont] read your words
cos it [might be] hurt
[needs to] hear your voices
somehow [feel] scared
said im fool [moron]
called im [stupid] silly girl
but i [just] dont wanna fall
drowning [deep] to the endless [painful] well
i [try to] stop looking at you
even i knew i [never] cann’t stop thinking [of you]
June 16th, 2009 coretan hati, ind
sebuah . tak dapat menjadi ,
namun sebuah , dapat menjadi .
seperti > yang memerlukan waktu menjadi -
bukan tak mungkin merubah ? menjadi =
bahkan malam pun ada menggantikan pagi
entah . atau ,
tapi kalau memang bisa
kenapa kita tak bersama ?
Diam
June 18th, 2009 coretan hati, ind
dalam marah, ku diam
dalam sedih, ku diam
dalam kalut, ku diam
dalam bimbang, ku diam
dalam kecewa, ku diam
ijinkan aku untuk tak diam
saat badai rasa melanda
saat ombak rindu menyapu
karena diam mungkin membunuhku
setengah mati menahan inginku
Messages
June 18th, 2009 eng, verrouillé
for you, whom i [still] love , my silence is not my anger, is not my hate, is not because im coward [who wants to run away from feelings]. my silence because i knew, you wont me to tell the world how deep i fall for you, my silence is my guardian to not doing something make you uncomfortable, to not doing something make you run. my silence is my self defense to not fall apart.
for you, whom i [still] care, my silence is not my ignorance, is not my hate, is not because i want to annoy you. my silence because i feel dissapointed with you, and i cannt be mad even i want. my silence is my keeper to stay in line, to keep my sane. my silence is my guard emotion.
for you, who [just] came in my world, my silence is not my arrogance, my silence is not my refusal, my silence is a warning, to keep my feeling stably, to keep me from daydreaming. my silence is my part of my fear.
To Die
June 24th, 2009 eng, verrouillé
i just think…
that die alone when we r still young is better than die alone when we r old
its not about the death, its about loneliness
and if loneliness is what life bring
when emptyness is i feel in the crowd
then die young is a sweetness
Forgiven Not Forgotten
July 14th, 2009 eng, verrouillé
nothing much to say tonight
wish i can spread the pain through the wind that blow
hope i can burry my body deep down the sea
its like the old word that world use to say
we learn to walk everyday
learn to love
learn to survive
learn to forgive
learn to forget
however we r just human being
shit..what am i talking about
its hurt when we lost someone we love
its pain when we know we can not be with someone we love
but u know what..
it is kill you when you lost someone closer to you
more than your picture in a mirror
it is kill you when you feel empty and no one hear you anymore
it is kill you when you have to choose to forgive or forget
and, mate..
if you are reading this..
im not gonna change you with anything
so do my feeling, will not change him with everything in world
forgive my stubborness, my stupidity, my blindness that make us fight
there will be a time, mate
when i can really let him go away
bring all this pain and suffer
in the mean time, i need you to brave me
to give me another air to breathe
need you here a lot more than you know
instead of what i feel to him
..
…
….
*thanks for all wonderful things you did*
Desert
July 15th, 2009 coretan hati, eng
here i am now
lost in the middle
no stars to guide
no one to ask
nothing can be sign
then i found
poison is hundred time interesting
than caught in neverland
New Heart In New World
August 7th, 2009 eng, gerak langkah
there is new heart
ask me to come
there is new heart
ask me to visit
there is new heart
ask me to stay
new heart with the big smile
new heart with the warmth
new heart that be my new world
Cerita Jemari
August 27th, 2009 coretan hati, ind
dan kedua jemari bertautan
tiap jari menemukan lekuk yang sesuai
dan kulit bersentuhan
hangat menyusup perlahan
bahkan saat tanya membayang
jika taut jemari tak lagi sama
saat hangatnya tak lagi ada
dan jemari pun menjawab
memperkuat genggaman erat erat
melangkahi hati yang masih bimbang
*wondering, when the hands u hold, not longer mine, would it feel the same?*
Times
August 29th, 2009 coretan hati, eng
every second i heard your voice
is a gallon happiness
each inch from your touch
is a million longing
everytime you smile
is a piece of heaven
and all that feelings
set me free
10101011 . 01101101
November 17th, 2009 ind, verrouillé
15:14
berkali kali memutar Miss You Lovena Silverchair
berpuluh kali melirik handphone
belasan kali mengecek facebook
menajamkan telinga untuk yang mungkin berdering
meski tahu itu tak lagi mungkin
hun…aku kangen..
Aku = Kamu
November 21st, 2009 ind, verrouillé
berkaca..
hey, siapa disana
dengan angkuhnya memandang balik mata
bercermin..
entah siapa kamu
yang terlihat ragu ragu
ucapkan saja rindu itu
teriakkan semua
ungkapkan seribu kata dibenakmu
buang semua angkuh dan ragu
karena kamu tahu, dia masih setia menunggu
December 7th, 2009 coretan hati, ind
Hari ni beberes kantor (gym) , baru beli meja n lemari baru..akhirna punya singgasana sendiri (evil_grin) *halah*. Pertama, dimulai dari merangkai meja gara-gara temen kantor yang ngotot bisa, terpaksa jadi tukang, paku sana paku sini, akhirna memaku jari sendiri . Ternyata sedikit bakat tukang dan banyak bakat merusak berguna juga . Terpasanglah meja dan lemari dengan sempurna
Berhubung mo bersih-bersih total, termasuk merapikan alat-alat elektronik, jadilah itu kabel-kabel komputer dan entah apalagi yang berserakkan, dicabut semua , tanpa ingat nanti dimana kudu mengembalikan hohohoho
Sadar diri kalo punya penyakit amnesia, langsung deh sms yang tersayang (ninja) alasanna sih biar masangin tu kabel komputer padahal sebenerna sekaligus ngobatin kangen *halah, bahasane* TERNYATA *sengaja injek kepslok* si dia masih sibuk sama proyek masa depan kami(evilsmirk) jadina belum bisa bantu pasangin , akhirna pahlawan kedua pun dipanggil
Meskipun kabel-kabel akhirna terpasang, tapi tetap sadja masih belum bisa terkonak internet (thinking) karena masih ada proses pengerimpingan yang belum selesei setidakna terimakasih pada sang pahlawan yang membantu memasangkan kabel dengan semestinya (girlkiss)
Dan, terpaksa harus menanggung semalam lagi penuh kerinduan *njijik’i bahasane* karena si dia masih berkutat dengan deadline
Sekarang, waktuna membereskan yang tersisa meskipun badan setengah mati lelahna, apa boleh buat, harus diseleseikan sekarang. Karena besok bakal jadi hari yang panjang , sedikitberharap dia akan datang, melegakan perasaan dan menumpahkan kerinduan
Ga akan pernah bosen buat bilang, SEMANGAT ya hun…!!! komputerku masih belum terkonakan *ah, dasar alasan*
December 6th, 2009 ind, undefine
beritahu aku
dunia yang tercermin di matamu
ceritakan padaku
seperti apa hidup dari balik pandangmu
berbagilah denganku
keceriaan yang tergambar dalam tatapmu
biarkan bibir mungilmu berceloteh
lepaskan saja kedua tangan yang ingin terus bergerak
tak keberatan melihatmu meloncat-loncat
tak pernah bosan mendengarmu tergelak
dan, mencintaimu adalah hal yang mutlak..
December 8th, 2009 ind, verrouillé
dia sederhana
tak rumit seperti hitungan matematika
tak memusingkan seperti rumus fisika
dia hanya dia
yang menjadi seperti adanya
yang terbiasa dengan kesendiriannya
yang membutuhkan rasa sakit hanya untuk tersadar
bahwa dia jatuh cinta
dia sederhana
tak peduli berapa rupiah di dalam dompetnya
tak memikirkan jumlah yang ia punya
dan ia, memang sederhana
tak mengerti bagaimana berkata-kata
jangankan puisi atau bunga
merayu saja sambil tertawa
cukup baginya aku tahu
saat ia sepenuh hati merindu
dan kata tak lagi bermakna
ketika dengan senang hati ia menggendongku
saat aku lelah dan tak lagi mau berjalan
dan semua rasa tersampaikan
dengan hanya satu tatap matanya
menembus langsung ke dalam hati
menebarkan seribu kata cinta
tak terucapkan, namun mengambang di udara
tak berbentuk, namun kutahu ia ada
ia memang sederhana
untuk lelaki ku, cukup cintai aku dengan segala kesederhanaanmu. karena kamu hanya lah kamu
December 8th, 2009 ind
Baru balik dari Police Department *halah* ternyata ga se mendebarkan seperti yang kukira xixixixi meskipun tetep aja malas klo kudu kesana lagi
Gara-gara ada yang sungguh bodoh nekat nge jebol kamar si Bos (doh) semua staf jadi kena getahna (nottalking) dan karena bos emosi, jadilah dilaporkan ke pihak yang berwenang.
Jadi, ceritana waktu si Bos keluar kota, ada yang dengan gobloknya nekat ngembat 2 buah hengpun beliau, sementara keadaan kamar terkunci. Anehna, 2 hengpun yang letakna berjauhan itu, hilang beserta dengan dus book na yang letakna didalam lemari diluar kamar, yang menimbulkan kecurigaan kalau pelakuna ya kita sendiri. Astagfirullah, rasana ga karu-karuan, kantor jadi penuh rasa curiga, terlebih lagi kamar beliau tepat disebelah kamarku, meskipun aku selalu lebih banyak di kantor.
Dan, hari ni jadi orang pertama yang dipanggil buat dimintain kesaksianna :-& sungguh, kalo aku tau siapa yang nakal, udah aku gebukkin abis-abisan pasti (idiot) bikin orang repot aja, padahal masih banyak yang kudu dipikirin.
Alhamdulillah, semua berjalan lancar, meski deg-deg pyar karena keingat beberapa tahun silam*pandangan menerawang* waktu itu juga sempet “terlibat” ma Police Department karena mencintai orang yang salah (ninja) yah, buat kamu yang tahu ceritana pasti maklum, yang belum tahu, maaf ya bukan konsumsi umum .
Semoga ini terakhir kalina berurusan dengan Police Department selain urusan SIM, atau surat surat yang lain..amin..
Dan, semoga masalah ini cepat terselesaikan..
December 11th, 2009 ind, verrouillé
Lelaki ku..
aku jatuh cinta [padamu]
kala kesadaran menghantam ego mu
bahwa kau jatuh cinta [padaku]
aku jatuh cinta [lagi]
kala kebimbangan membutakanmu
dan kecemburuan menguasai
hanya karena [kamu] mencintaiku
aku jatuh cinta [lagi]
kala hangat jemarimu
menggenggam erat menguatkanku
meyakinkan kamu ada
aku jatuh cinta [lagi]
kala pelukanmu menenangkanku
memaafkanku yang terlupa
meninggalkan barang berharga mu begitu saja
aku jatuh cinta [lagi]
pada senyum malu-malu
yang menghiasi wajahmu
meyakinkanku, 5 atau 10 lagi
senyum itu masih milikku
jangan pernah membuatku berhenti jatuh cinta lagi padamu, lagi..lagi..dan lagi
December 11th, 2009 ind, verrouillé
hiks…rasa na pengen teriak kenceng-kenceng . Gara-gara terburu napsu n udah bosan pada puncakna, nekat nyalon di tempat yang ngga biasa. Seperti yang sudah diduga, hasilna GATOT alias HANCUR ..aaaaaaaaaaaarggggghhhhh!!!!jadi pengen nyakar nyakar kapsterna nih .
Padahal hasrat hati cuma pengen ganti warna rambut , sedikit memberi pencerahan, hasilna malah ga karu karuan hiks hiks padahal besok mo training orang, ada meeting penting, paling penting sih..mau nganter si dia hiks kan ga asyik kalo gara-gara rambut jadi ga pede
Terpaksa, malam ini juga, apapun carana, rambut kudu bisa balik hitam, dan yang lebih menyebalkan lagi, terpaksa harus merelakan rupiah yang terbuang percuma
December 12th, 2009 Uncategorized, ind
06.30 : panic karena warna rambut yang berantakan alt=”(idiot)”>
08.30 : pake pewarna rambut yang ke4 kali na
09.15 : kebutkebutan ke bandara
09.30 : cari souvenir buat dia
10. 26 : farewell @ airport
11.30 : kebutkebutan anter surat penting yang ketinggalan *already miss u*
11.45 : kepleset karena larilari kebelet pipis *wish u here*
12.32 : ngurusin filefile penting
14.22 : meeting
15. 35 : siapsiap sekulah
16.40 : telat masuk kelas, ujian
17.30 : pulang, tepar karena obat, setelah sebelumna telp2an
menidur dan terbangun karena telpon, what a day for me. Overall, this is HOT SUNNY DAY..!!well, mari tetap semangat, karena aku tahu kamu pun iya *siapsiap nahan kangen berabadabad*
December 14th, 2009 ind, verrouillé
saya benci kamu
benci ketidakpekaanmu
benci ketaksensitifanmu
benci ketakpedulianmu
benci sampai saya ingin pergi
benci sampai saya ingin memaki
kamu tahu…
saya lelah harus terus mengerti
saya capek harus terus memahami
saya benci harus terus menghargai tanpa dihargai
saya muak dengan kata maaf tanpa bukti
saya benci kamu
dan semoga hanya untuk malam ini
December 22nd, 2009 ind, verrouillé
sedikit saja, beri aku tempat disudut hatimu
acuhkan saja bila kau terganggu
sebentar saja, beri aku waktu dalam 1 x 24 jam mu
lambaikan saja tanganmu bila kau terburu-buru
sekerjap saja, biarkan aku hadir dalam kerling matamu
melirik saja bila kau tak suka
itu saja, cukup buatku bahagia
January 4th, 2010 ind, verrouillé
terkadang, kaki tak sanggup lagi berlari
terkadang, rasa tak mau lagi mengerti
terkadang, hanya ingin diam
terkadang, sakitnya tak terobati
tutup pintu, saatnya pergi
Terkadang
April 28th, 2010 verouille
dapatkah kau dengar suaraku ?
berbisik seperti hembusan angin
menanyakan kabarmu
dapatkah kau rasa kekhawatiranku ?
menetes seperti embun pagi hari
sekedar ingin tahu tentangmu
dapatkah kau raba kecemasanku
berbintik bintik bagai gatal yang menyebar
tak sabar mendengar kisahmu
yah, karena aku tak mungkin berteriak
ditengah isak tangis yang menyergap
yah, aku pun tak mungkin menghampiri
disaat tatapnya menusuk jiwa
yah, aku hanya bisa berharap
kamu baik baik saja dengannya
dia, yang jatuh cinta mati padamu
